I heard an interesting story the other day. This dad was talking to Donald Miller(author of Blue Like Jazz,among others) about his teenager daughter. He did not have any good feelings towards the young guy that was dating his daughter. It’s typical I know, but this was something more. He knew that if they continued to date, this guy would end up bringing his daughter down a road that wasn’t for her. So now this father was stuck with the idea he needed to break them up, but didn’t know the best way. So he asked Donald Miller.
Miller’s reply? “What kind of story is your daughter living in?”
I can imagine the dad thinking in his head, “What kind of question is this?” But as he explained more about his daughter, the more he realized this was the question that mattered the most. You see, his daughter didn’t have much responsibilities. She took her little brother to school and some boring household chores. Her boyfriend on the other hand, was offering her a part in something bigger. A star role in the movie. A story that she mattered in, a story that she felt loved in.
So now the dad knew what he needed to do after this being revealed to him. He needed to have his daughter involved in a story bigger than her home, bigger than her bf, bigger than herself. So he researched and found a village across the ocean in Africa that didn’t have clean drinking water. He then went home to challenge not only his daughter, but wife and son to do something. It was unacceptable for a village to not have clean drinking water. They HAD to do something about it. He told his daughter she was loved, beautiful, and had so much to offer to the world. And what do you know, the daughter broke up with the bf a short time later so she could have more time to spend on this project.
I was reminded of this story just this weekend. Gerado is a teen in the neighborhood who I have become close with. He loves to skate, and play pool. Our table isn’t the greatest in the Teen Center, OK I’ll be honest, it sucks. There isn’t a flat spot on it, so every ball rolls to the right side. The pockets barely hold a ball, the felt is falling apart, and the legs wobble so you can’t ever get it level. Matt and I were going to revamp it in the next two weeks so the kids would have something playable. Well Gerado was looking for pool tables on CraigsList for us to maybe buy. He found a few and wondered if I would email the person myself. I said no for two reasons
1. I’m lazy and didn’t want to do anything because it was friday.
2. I wanted to put Gerado in a spot that would be challenging to himself, and involve him in helping out with Solidarity and something bigger than himself.
So I told Gerado to email people and see if they would be interested in donating there pool table, fully realizing most people would say no. Immediately he asked me for help on writing the emails. I said no, this is your responsibility.
Well the next day I had 3 calls from Gerado in a matter of 2 hours before 10 am. He had found someone who was willing to donate a 250 dollar pool table! We didn’t have a chance to pick it up so we couldn’t get it. It put him in a funk, but he kept on trying.
When I walked into work today I immediately received a text message from Gerado asking if we can give tax donation forms. I said yes, why? He told me to then check my email.
Some guy had a pool table for sale for 1500 dollars. Gerado did all the work himself and now the guy wants to donate the table to us! All because of the work that Gerado did!
I know this is a small example of involving the kids in something bigger than themselves. But it’s here. And it happens. And it’s transforming.
It made me take a step back and think about my work within Solidarity, and my work back home in youth ministry. What kind of story am I inviting the teenagers I work with to be involved in? If I’m brutally honest, i usually take the attitude of I’ll do it myself, they don’t understand how to do it. Is that the best way to be an agent of transformation in a teenagers life? Or is it challenging them to be a part of something bigger than themselves? Something that has been ongoing since the beginning of time? A chance to advance the Kingdom Among Us in any which way possible. This is the generation that has a chance to change the world with the love of Christ. Challenge them, love them, walk alongside them, pray for them. They are the story, they are the world changers if given the opportunity.
What kind of story are you living in……………………..
What kind of story are you challenging others to live in……………
